Welcome to another Fit Friday!! Today I want to focus just a little bit on the way we view ourselves, our bodies, and mostly how these feelings can affect our children. I am certainly not a professional when it comes to these things, but I did have 2 experiences that I wanted to share that have really impacted me and my attitude about my body.
I've been very lucky in the sense that as I have gotten older, I have gotten a lot more comfortable in my skin. I've always had a fairly good self esteem and tried to acknowledge areas that needed improvement....and then worked to make it happen. Until I had my son that is :) After over a month and a half on bedrest and regular nightly trips to the local Iceberg for shakes, things were not looking too pretty after I had my little guy. For the first time I could remember I was really embarrassed about my body. I didn't feel comfortable going out, I wouldn't wear a swimsuit when I took my kids swimming, and I was grumpy every morning as I tried to squeeze into something that didn't look TOO horrible. But one morning something Skylar said brought about an amazing realization that has stuck with me to this day.
My girls had a hard time while I was on bedrest, and one of the things Skylar missed the most was me playing duck, duck, goose with them. She LOVED that game and could not understand why I had to lay on the couch all day instead of chasing her around. Well, one morning as I was in my closet just staring at all my depressing options Skylar came running in, gave me a huge hug and said "I am so happy you are normal again and can play with me Mommy!!" She was so happy that I had a body that could once again function as a mommy, and all I was doing was tearing apart that body for not looking the way I thought it should. I remember thinking about how I cried EVERY night on bedrest, feeling so guilty that I couldn't take care of those precious children the way I wanted to and just dreaming of the day I could run, chase and play with them again. Well, now that day was here and instead of showing my gratitude for a strong body that not only allowed me to do all those wonderful things but had also brought a precious new spirit to the earth, I was filled with insecurity and dislike. It was a life-changing moment for me. I was no longer ashamed or embarrased. Instead I was filled with a healthy desire to make the most of this body I was given, to take care of it in a way so I can do all the things I want to do, and mostly a deep gratitude for it. I am so grateful for that moment. Now as I strive to once again get this post-baby body back to where I want it, there is no dislike or discouragement. I know I am working on it, and that makes me okay with where I am RIGHT now. I look at all the things my body CAN do, even if its NOT fitting into that one perfect pair of jeans :)
Okay, 2nd one! Sorry, that was pretty long :) Years ago a sister in my old ward told me a story that made a huge impact on me. She talked about how when she was little she thought her mom was the most beautiful woman in the world. Then one day she heard her mom talking to her friend, saying how fat she was and how much she disliked this and that about her body. It totally changed the way my friend looked at her. She had never even realized her mom was overweight, to her she was perfect. But once she heard those things, she started to look at her differently and even later became embarrased about her mom's weight and the way she looked. As a mother of 3 daughters I KNOW how much they listen and absorb, and it terrifies me how young they are starting to notice and worry about things like this. That story made me want to be more aware of the way I talk about myself and others around my children. The world will do a good enough job of teaching them they are never skinny enough, pretty enough, or just enough...they certainly don't need to hear it from their mother too.
This week my Fit goal is to acknowledge the things I LOVE about myself and my body. This is a hard one...much harder than running 3 miles ;) But I think its probably much more important too. So even though I'm still on that fit journey, I am going to acknowledge and celebrate the things I am doing right, and cut myself a little slack on the areas that still need improvement. Let's hear it ladies....what are some things you LOVE about your body?? Here's mine for the day: even though I am about 10 lbs bigger and haven't been for 4 years...I can still tear up that 5:15 am spin class like nobody else!! :) Have a great week everyone and thank you so much for stopping by!!
3 comments:
Wonderful post Tonii. You are a great inspiration to me.
I love everything about me. I know that sounds cocky but it true. I have learned not to beat myself up at all now. I keep a picture of me from a year ago and look at the progress that I have made. I have lost 50lbs and went from a size 18 to size 9 in pants and now instead of weighing myself I just enjoy working out and I know that is the only important thing. I buy a pair of new pants in a smaller size and make that my goal. If I ever start feeling bad I look at my goal pants then try on my old fat pants and am proud of my journy and get excited for the future.
Thank you once again for an inspiring post. I am right there with you on this. I am very discouraged after this 4th child getting back into my normal shape. I too need to look at the things I love about my body instead of focusing on the things I dislike. This has helped me a lot! Thank you for posting this.
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